


You Make Me Breathe Again

by juno_verse



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Endgame Clarke Griffin/Lexa, F/F, Fluff and Smut, Hanahaki Disease, Happy Ending, Heda Lexa (The 100), Light Angst, Love, Love Confessions, Softcore Porn, Temporarily Unrequited Love, Trigedasleng, clexa is happy, lexa will not die pls, lines from the series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:41:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26342773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/juno_verse/pseuds/juno_verse
Summary: Hanahaki Disease, a fictional eastern disease where the victim coughs out flower petals as it grows inside their lungs taking up all the space. A disease one can get from unrequited love and could only be gone once their feelings are mutual or through surgery – losing all romantic feelings.
Relationships: Clarke Griffin/Lexa
Comments: 2
Kudos: 108





	You Make Me Breathe Again

_Hanahaki Disease, a fictional eastern disease where the victim coughs out flower petals as it grows inside their lungs taking up all the space. A disease one can get from unrequited love and could only be gone once their feelings are mutual or through surgery – losing all romantic feelings._

Lexa chuckled at the irony of her situation. Remembering how confident she was telling Clarke that feelings – love is a weakness. Now it came to bite her in the ass. How could she be careless? Her walls were high and mighty and she made sure her feelings are in line. All tumbling down just because of a girl that fell from the sky that started to lecture her about peace. After their little argument about sending a troop member to kill Octavia for knowing about the missile, Clarke just had to hit her where it hurt.

“You say having feelings makes me weak. But you’re weak for hiding from them. I might be a hypocrite Lexa, but you’re a liar.” Clarke said with a fervor, knowing she was getting through the Commander. _Damn it, Clarke. Damn right I’m hiding from them. I don’t want to lose you._ Lexa felt her throat go dry as Clarke started to march closer.

“You felt something for Gustus. You’re still haunted by Costia. You want everyone to think you’re above it all, but I see _right through you_.” Lexa bumped on the table, gripping on it as Clarke pushed her for answers. “Get **_out._** ” Lexa said with so much poison in her voice, fearing for the worse. _Not now Clarke, not when we’re in the middle of a war._

“250 people died in that village. I know you felt for them, but you let them burn.” Clarke said with her face just inches from Lexa’s. Lexa was conflicted, with Clarke’s face just inches from her she could just kiss her. She visibly gulped, knowing that there was truth behind the blonde’s words. _Two can play this game._

“Not everyone. _Not you._ ” Lexa admitted, with a lump in her throat. She saw Clarke’s face soften as if she wasn’t in the middle of protesting. Clarke took a few staggering steps backward, her eyes ever so quickly shifting to Lexa’s lips and back to her eyes again. Lexa tried to admit her feelings for the blonde using her eyes, nearly brimming with tears. _See my walls tear itself down for you._

“Well if you care about me then, trust me.” And they were back to Octavia again. Clarke left her tent and Lexa looked up trying to hold back her tears. Her chest filled with heaviness as she came to terms with how she felt for Clarke. _Not again, please._ She felt a sharp pain in her lungs, gripping her chest tightly.

\--------------------------------------

A few minutes later, after clearing her thoughts and setting herself straight, she called for Clarke to come to her tent. “You sent for me?” Clarke entered making her way next to the brunette. “Yes. Octavia has nothing to fear from me.” Lexa said as she saw Clarke send her a grateful look with a hint of a smile on her face. “I do trust you, Clarke.” _Much more than you know._ “I know how hard that is for you.” Clarke whispered sincerely with an understanding smile on her face.

“You think our ways are harsh, that’s how we survive.” Lexa spoke with a convincing voice. “Maybe life should be about more than just surviving. Don’t we deserve better than that?” Clarke asked softly. Lexa couldn’t keep her eyes off of Clarke. This girl just keeps on finding more and more ways to leave a mark on Lexa’s life. Her heart was beating so fast being so close to the blonde girl craving to be closer.

“Maybe we do.” Lexa answered with a hushed tone, her eyes never straying away from Clarke’s lips. Clarke faced her and Lexa took her chance. She grabbed Clarke’s cheek softly and kissed her passionately. They stayed like that, unmoving for a few seconds testing the waters. Lexa pulled away for a brief moment, only to be kissed back by Clarke. _She’s kissing me back._ Lexa’s heart fluttered, her heart nearly sounding like their war drums. She felt a hand on her waist as their kiss got more passionate. Lexa tried to take control and pushed more, only for Clarke to lean away.

“I’m sorry. I’m not ready to be with anyone. Not yet.” Clarke apologized, her face fearing Lexa’s reaction. But Lexa’s face was stoic, unreadable. Her head held high as she nodded. They stared at each other for a while only to be interrupted by the war troops.

Clarke headed out first and Lexa stayed back for a few moments. Feeling her lungs be filled with flowers, she started coughing. Her hand covering her mouth, and the other clutching her tightening throat. It hurt so badly, she was losing her breath and coughing terribly. _What is this?_ She thought as she saw petals on her hand.

“Commander? The army is gathering and waiting for-“ Indra walked in her tent and stopped talking seeing Lexa’s state. “Indra-“ Coughed out more petals again. “Commander! You need immediate medical attention. I know what this is.” Indra rushed to her side. “No, Indra please. Let’s get this war over with first.” Lexa talked weakly, her throat threatening to cough out more petals. “I can do it, Indra.” Lexa said almost too convincingly. Indra with a hint of doubt seen in her eyes nodded.

\------------------------------

Lexa wasn’t getting better any time soon. But she was getting closer to her goal of uniting the Sky people with her tribe, with Clarke as their ambassador. Right now, she was being examined by the tribe doctor with Titus the Flamekeeper by her side.

“This disease isn’t infectious. Although I am surprised that the great Commander has it.” The doctor exclaimed. “Watch your mouth.” Titus spoke harshly. “I apologize. But this is not to be taken lightly. The flowers will keep on growing in her lungs taking up all the air. It can be removed surgically or if your feelings are reciprocated.”

Lexa sighed, feeling hurt not only within her lungs but within her heart. She thought that maybe she had a chance with Clarke. “Let’s remove it surgically, Heda-“ Titus spoke but was interrupted by a guard entering. “Commander, Wanheda is calling for you.” The guard spoke and Lexa stood up quickly. “Commander, please-“ Lexa raised her hand to stop Titus from continuing and said, “I will be fine, Titus. I’ll tell you when we can schedule the operation.”

Lexa stepped in her throne room where Clarke was waiting. “Thank you for staying.” Lexa said. _I’m really glad to see your face again._ “I stayed because it was the right thing for my people.” Clarke spoke back. “ **Our** people.” Lexa emphasized. Clarke stepped forward, fear and doubt visible on her face, and said, “If you betray me again-“ Almost instantly Lexa answered, “I won’t.” _I nearly lost you when I did._ Seeing the unwavering doubt in Clarke’s eyes, Lexa kneeled. _Titus will kill me seeing me bow to someone._

The shock was evident on Clarke’s face, seeing the Commander kneel for her just as she was told earlier that Lexa never bowed to anyone. “I swear fealty to you, Clarke kom Skaikru. I vow to treat your needs as my own, and your people as my people.” _I swear to protect you even if it costs me my life and my love for you._ Lexa swore with determination in her voice as she watched Clarke’s eyes be filled with shock and wonder. Clarke stuck out her hand and Lexa grabbed it. _Do not ever doubt this, Clarke._

\------------------------------------------

Lexa scheduled the date of the operation when Clarke was about to leave Polis to return to her people. She could no longer handle the pain in her lungs that spread up to her chest then to her throat. Removing her armor and cape, she started to have a coughing fit. Her eyes closed due to the continuous attack of her throat. She opened her eyes once she has calmed down, seeing the black petals strewn all over the floor. Hearing someone enter, she wiped her mouth and fixed her hair.

Clarke entered her room as Lexa was walking out of her changing area. Lexa met Clarke’s eyes with sad ones. Knowing that in a few hours the blonde would be leaving her and her feelings gone. She believed that feelings made people weak, but her feelings for Clarke had her making better decisions for her people. She understood where Clarke came from and she felt the need for justice rather than vengeance. Her feelings for Clarke were welcomed, but it will be gone once her surgery starts.

“When do you leave?” Lexa asked hating how somber her voice sounds. _I sound so weak._ “Now.” Clarke spoke, her voice straining to answer. Lexa gave a nod as Clarke walked closer to her. “I’m sorry.” Clark whispered. _Please don’t make this anymore harder for me, Clarke._ “Don’t be. You have to go back to your people. That why I-“ Lexa stopped herself, Clarke’s eyes darting to hers waiting for her to finish that sentence. _That’s why I am hopelessly in love with you._

“That’s why you’re you.” Lexa continued. _That was close. It was always your people over yourself, Clarke. And I fell for you because of it._ Clarke’s eyes filled with uncertainty and nodded. “Maybe someday, you and I won’t owe nothing more to our people.” Clarke said, her voice soft. “I hope so.” Lexa nodded her eyes nearly brimming with tears. She extended her arm as a way of saying goodbye, and Clarke offered hers in return.

“May we meet again.” Said Lexa, her voice laced with irony and sorrow. Clarke smiled softly, her eyes darting to Lexa’s lips. Lexa’s heart soared as Clarke on the brink of tears grabbed her cheek and kissed her passionately. Lexa pulled away, her eyes filled with tears and shock evident on her face. _She kissed me and I can breathe._ Lexa’s lungs cleared as she started to breathe heavily due to her want for Clarke.

They kissed again, this time harder and with need. Soft moans of relief were heard throughout the room. _I waited for this for so long._ Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa’s neck removing her top. Lexa sat on her bed, staring at Clarke’s eyes to look for any hint of uncertainty. And there wasn’t.

Clarke straddled Lexa’s hips as they continued to kiss with fervor.

\-------------------------------

Clarke was bare naked below her, her chest heaving as she tries to catch her breath. Lexa smiled down at her, her heart beating fast. “Meizen.” _(Beautiful)_ Lexa whispered her eyes never leaving Clarke’s. The latter felt like she was under observation, with the way Lexa’s eyes were roaming her body. Clarke blushed a light pink and arched her hips up. Lexa let out a soft moan as Clarke tried to distract her from looking at her. “I can’t wait anymore, Heda."

With the way it sounds from Clarke’s mouth and in this situation, she can’t bear to hear it from anyone else. The brunette trailed kisses from Clarke’s neck and downwards to her collarbone, leaving soft purple marks. Clarke arched her back, wanting to give everything to Lexa. She took in her mouth Clarke’s bosom then the other, making sure the buds were given attention. Lexa loved the fact that Clarke was writhing below her and she took pleasure from seeing Clarke submit to her like this.

“Ai yu don been raun hod in kom Yu gon krei long. Em bash op ai gon kik en breathe as ai lungs huk op au. Ba nau, yu huk op ai moun breath kom life.” _(I have been in love with you for so long. It hurt me to live and breathe as my lungs gave out. But now, you give me another breath of life.)_ Lexa spoke her heart out, wanting to make sure that Clarke knew how she felt. Clarke nearly cried, the lump in her throat didn’t help her too.

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get back to you, Lexa. Thank you for waiting for me.” Clarke said as she gave a passionate kiss to the brunette girl. Lexa’s heart was full, so full. She licked a trail downwards and stopped at where Clarke wanted it. Lexa licked her nub and inserted a finger in Clarke. The blonde’s fingers immediately tangled on Lexa’s hair as she ate her out, trying so hard to contain her moans.

“Clarke, let me hear you please.” Lexa ordered her, and who was Clarke to say no? The latter’s hip started to move by itself along with Lexa’s tongue, her moans loud and needy. “Lexa, more please.” Clarke moaned out, her back arching trying to get Lexa inside her. The brunette obliged inserting another finger which Clarke welcomed with a gasp. Lexa’s fingers curved and hit a certain spot that made the blonde’s vision blurry. “Right there, again.”

Lexa fastened her pace and kept hitting the same spot while her tongue did work on Clarke’s swollen nub. “I’m close, Lexa! Oh, god.” Clarke moaned, her grip on Lexa’s hair tightening trying to push her closer. Clarke’s mouth turned into a silent ‘O’ for a few seconds then let out an earth-shattering moan as she reached her peak. Lexa helped her ride it out by continuing to move her fingers. 

Lexa gave her pelvis a quick kiss, before going up to kiss Clarke on her lips. Clarke kissed her back whilst trying to catch her breath. “You alright?” Lexa asked with concern written all over her face. Clarke gave her a nod and smirked, “Your turn, Heda.”

\------------------------------------------------

“Shh…” Lexa shushed Clarke as she was trying to talk about her plan with Octavia. The blonde chuckled at her antics and proceeded to run her fingers on Lexa’s back. “I was supposed to go into surgery today, Clarke.” Lexa spoke softly. She felt Clarke shift her weight and propped her chin on Lexa’s shoulder. “What? Why didn’t you tell me? What for?” Clarke worried, seeking the answers from the brunette’s eyes. Lexa faced her and said, “Hanahaki disease. I was running out of air in my lungs, because flowers were growing. It was because of unrequited love. Surgery was supposed to remove it, but I’d lose my love for you.” Clarke felt the guilt throughout her entire body. “Don’t feel guilty, Clarke. You’re here now.” Lexa said and caught Clarke’s face with her hand. Clarke nodded with an apologetic look on her face, “I’m sorry.”

Lexa smiled at her and said, “You make me breathe now, Clarke. You gave me life again.”

**Author's Note:**

> Isn't it ironic that Clarke nearly ran out of air in the Ark but was saved when she came to Earth, only for her to be someone else's way to breathe again? Please tell me what you think! Give me prompts too. You can always leave them in the comments.


End file.
